Five, five, FIVE, five drafts dangling in my wordpress dashboard thingy. Before all of those entries piled up, I swore there were only two that I drafted, and only because they were future entry-ideas. Now there are five, five because I sorta lost my itch, five because I lost writing angles, five because I couldn’t, for the life of me, end any of them. So, I decided, because I’m demented like this, to try and mash it all up into one entry 😀 yay. fun. woot.
So here goes….
Stale entry # 1
All about mom, my mom was fantabulous as all moms are. My family and I are pretty much lost without her, although they know how to hang on to the scraps that she left behind (i.e. pot-luck Christmas lunch, which I heard was a disaster). I on the other hand, only had her as my confidante when it came to family matters. She was my only source of strength, the only one in my family that had the patience to understand me. I’m pretty much shaken without her, that I just want to break away from my so-called-family and start anew on my own, but can’t cause I can’t just leave dad behind.
She indirectly prepared me for independence all my life, probably because she prepared my sister for otherwise. Little wounds, minor headaches, colds and/or similar, were brushed aside once I turned ten, all of a sudden I had to learn how to know when to drink my medicine, and learn how to sleep without the air-condition on all day long. She was all around tough, but comforted me during the dramatic height of things. She hardly helped me with school stuff, she provided for a tutor and tortured me when it came to memorizing stuff when I was younger, but once I turned into a teenager, my studying habbits were my responsibility. My grades, my responsibility, my life.
Like every mom, she knew exactly what you needed at exact time that you needed it. She cooked like a gourmet chef. She always kept her things in order, she had the best smell in the world and no matter how much she complained about how awkward my dad is, she loved him and spoiled him.
In a big almost empty house my dad and I go about every day, it’s really hard for the both of us to adjust to things without her. He started wearing his wedding ring a few months ago, which almost made me cry, he hasn’t worn that in years. I started looking for more things that were hers that still had her smell…I’m running out of sheets and pillows. Like I said, we’re all trying to hang on to what’s left…
It’s really tough without her.
Stale entry # 2
The beach, it was just last year when I last (redundant) stepped on sand (which I ended up paying double for in the end) it was on our “surprise” company outing trip. They made it seem like a surprise because they didn’t want to let our clients know that we had enough money to be flown to Boracay and back for a little vacation. That said vacation, had a financial bond, where it stated that if any of us left the company we’d have to pay for the trip *sighs*.
To remove the bad after taste of paying for that vacation I’d skip to the beach again this year, and every summer for that matter. I wasn’t privileged with the right friends/family who go to the beach or on little vacation trips all the time, they would either be, too busy, too confused, too poor, not the right people (referring to friends), or I wouldn’t be invited at all.
I searched tirelessly for packages and places for a trip to the beach with Jonar and his siblings, but until now we haven’t chosen a thing yet…and seriously, if I have to go to the beach alone…I will, if only to have a tan and to actually experience it this year. I don’t have to wait for indecisive people or people who babble out invites and don’t follow through.
I deserve to beach this year, and beach I will!
Stale entry # 3
I always believed that I don’t only have one true love. I believe that there is always one, at each point in our lives…and the “point” mentioned is really up to you. Here are examples:
At 16 I had my first official boyfriend, at that particulart time he was my true and first love. My second was, also when I was same age, we hardly even got into a relationship so I’m not so sure that you can call it true love, but before we had our falling out, I was almost certain he was the next after my first boyfriend…we shall tag him as “the one that got away” – Disclaimer: I do not wish things to be different, or wish for him to have become my boyfriend, He is tagged as the one who got away because…he did get away (pointing out the obvious is fun!) -. Nonetheless, no matter what I call him, I did really fall for him, it just didn’t happen. My third came along when I was 25, He was a funny Filipino working in Chicago, we had tons and tons in common and he made me laugh alot, and I believe that was my most favorite thing about him. He was also the one that helped me through part of a very traumatic incident so yes, he was very useful. My fourth and most painful is my ex-fiancé, for the most part it was fun, for the last few months it was hell…thank God that’s over. Last but never least is the love of my life forever 😛 click this link to find out more! -> My Two-floors-above-four-eyed-base-playing-dorky-vocalist-writer-system-admin-answer-to-my-prayer.
Stale entry #4
This entry is related to #3 and because of my laziness here is a short explanation: I think I had a song for every guy…like all girls do (typical). So here’s a list.
The one that got away – has no song….xD
Boy at 25
I had this song on loop when I first met him…<3 I crushed him big time back then 😛
yayness! Moving on….
Stale entry #5
Is about my internal battle on which Lomo to purchase next!
I am currently torn between, the Blackbird, Fly and the Lubitel 166, both TLR’s, I like them both…my basis for a final decision would be it’s availability. Hopefully I can get a hold of either one easily through a nearby shop or at Quiapo…I’m waaaaayy too impatient to wait longer for any of these cameras :P. If they’re both available, I’ll check for their prices to see if I can be greedy and buy both, if not I’ll get the Lubitel 😛 weeeeeeeee.
These are the entries I’ve been trying to write about so far and of course out of frustration I decided to vomit them all in one entry to hit 5 birds with one stone 😀 ah…triumph! Yayness!
*merrily skips away*